There may be hope for the world after all: The loonies are drinking unfiltered water and jumping onto subway tracks

There is a god, and his instrument is darwin

The latest craze among the Best and the Brightest is "raw water": unfiltered, untreated, and swarming with parasites. Costs $16 a bottle, and is selling out in all our finest cities.

And in New York, a gentleman jumped onto the tracks and threatened [sic] to lick the third rail, while screaming about sexual harassment, capitalism, and various other ills of modern society.

No mention as to whether he'd been drinking raw water but together, these are encouraging trends.