Attention, students: at your request and upon your demand, humor has been permanently banned from campus

Here’s a contract proffered to a comedian who was scheduled to perform at a university.



Someone should inform these students that from the days of court jesters, comic acts were sarcastic, biting, and often funny. Maybe it this news was delivered with a cuddle bear it would be absorbed, though I doubt it: the banshees and their craven peers have declared that there is no place for humor in their modern world.

Even Jerry Seinfeld — Jerry Seinfeld! — has announced that he will no longer appear at college campuses. Sheesh; the children won’t ever know about humor, but I suppose they won’t miss it.