It's a pity, but it would explain his bizarre, unhinged performance the past few years

rehab rudi

rehab rudi

Rudy Giuliani gave a rambling, incoherent speech last night. Drunk? That seems to be the consensus, even among his usual supporters at the NY Post.

This really hit the news two weeks ago, when the poor guy denied he was an alcoholic (usually a trouble sign right there; if people are asking ….) and then, after admitting that he “likes my scotch” started to say that he was a “functioning alcoholic” before amending that to “I’m more functional than 90% of the people”. It turns, out, however, that Guiliani’s alcoholism has been known about in D.C. for years, and even his pal, Donald Trump is reported to have ruled out a cabinet position for him because of his drinking.

So it’s sad. Giuliani was the man for New York City post 9/11, and did his job superbly. No one can take that away from him, but he’s clearly not that man today.

UPDATE, 9/13: The NY Post article was completely rewritten overnight and alll references to him raving, meandering and acting drunk were removed. Was the original report unfair, or does Rudy still have friends in high places at the Post? I don’t know, but his defense of his drinking in that interview a few weeks ago: “I’m not a drunk, I’m just a single-malt connoiseur” is a line I’ve heard many times over the years (along with it’s cousin, the “oenophile” defense, and sometimes, it’s true.

Fun facts:

The bottom three deciles, or 30 percent of Americans, say they don't drink at all. That figure might be a little high since some people probably say they don't drink but occasionally do … but let's go with it.

  • The fourth decile consumes .02 drinks per week. Since assumedly no one is squeezing a couple drops from an eyedropper, that works out to about one drink a year. (Birthday, maybe?)

  • The fifth decile consumes .14 drinks per week. That's about seven drinks a year. Holidays, possibly, or that office party you were dragged to and tried to make the best of. (Or am I the only one who has done that?)

  • The sixth decile consumes .63 drinks per week. That's a little over half a drink, or 32 drinks a year.

So, 60 percent of Americans aged 18 and over consumer half a drink or less a week. Surprising? (It was to me--based on the square footage of the beer and wine section at the grocery store I assumed the number would be a little higher.)

Moving on:

  • The seventh decile consumes 2.17 drinks per week. And right about now the alcoholic beverage industry thinks, "Are we really getting a return on all our advertising spending?"

  • The eighth decile consumes 6.25 drinks per week. Finally we're close to a drink a day or a number of drinks on Friday night.) People who have a glass of wine a beer with TV are in the top 30% of adults in terms of alcohol consumption. While one drink a day isn't much--especially since some health experts say a glass of red wine a day can reduce the risk of heart disease--that still means this decile drinks more than 70% of Americans.

  • The ninth decile consumes 15.28 drinks per week. Two drinks a day, top 20% in terms of alcohol consumption.

But let's say you're a high achiever and always want to be at the top of any list. Say your goal is to reach the tenth decile and land in the top 10% of American drinkers.

Here's what you need to do:

  • The tenth decile consumes 73.85 drinks per week. That's right, 73 drinks a week. Basically 10 drinks a day. Forget a glass or two of wine with dinner--you need to drink roughly two bottles of wine with dinner. Forget a couple beers--you need to pound down close to a 12-pack of beer every day. (Tell me your bladder and your wallet don't hurt just thinking about it.)

Here's what all this means:

  • The top 10% of drinkers account for more than half of all alcohol consumed in the U.S.

  • The median consumption is 3 drinks per week among those who do drink (tossing out the 30% who don't drink at all.)

  • According to Cook, "... the heaviest drinkers are of greatly disproportionateimportance to the sales and profitability of the alcoholic beverage industry. If the top decile could be induced to curb their consumption to that of the next lower group (the ninth decile) then total ethanol sales would fall by 60%."

Maybe you're not surprised. After all, everyone knows power users are critical; the top 20 to 30% of users tend to generate 70 to 80% of sales for the average product or services. So maybe it comes as no shock to you that "power drinkers" would make up such a huge proportion of alcohol sales.