Who can explain the mysteries of life?

Portland residents perplexed by homeless cabins built along prime riverfront property

Residents living near Portland's Willamette River have witnessed a series of homeless cabins and structures being built on prime river real estate with "million-dollar" city views but have so far been unable to get anyone to do anything about it.

"Pretty much everyone comes back and says that they don’t have jurisdiction because it’s Union Pacific, it’s a railroad," Ric Scaramella, who owns a condominium on the other side of the Willamette River, told KOIN in a report Sunday.

Scaramella told the outlet that people across the river from his home have been building makeshift cabins, complete with doors, windows and sometimes even solar panels, on the banks of the river that feature views of downtown Portland.

According to a reporter for an outlet who took a boat to get a closer look at the structures, many of the buildings are made out of driftwood and resemble beaver dams, while further down the river there was a collection of garbage and debris on the shoreline.

"Union Pacific Police regularly patrol our property and enforce trespassing laws; however, this area is particularly challenging to enforce, because cabins are near the water’s edge. Under Ordinary High Water Mark common law, the boundary separating public land from private land is determined by natural fluctuations of the water, making it a legal gray area," the company said in a statement to KOIN.

The Oregon Department of State Lands isn't so sure, telling KOIN that jurisdiction of the area depends on where the riverbank ends.

The city of Portland has also declined to take responsibility for the area, arguing that the structures sit on land owned by Union Pacific or the Port of Portland. The Oregon Department of Environmental Quality and the Army Corps of Engineers also told KOIN they play no role in overseeing the area.

Were there the will to resolve these jurisdictional issues, they could be. But the problems of the “unsheltered” may derive from more than a mere lack of housing; for instance, why wont they/can’t they work and earn rent money, or why don’t they choose to live in one of the many homeless shelters provided by the city’s and state taxpayers where they could sober up and rejoin society? Your fascist blogger offers a hint:

One woman who identified herself only as "Paula" agreed to chat with the outlet, telling KOIN that she has lived on her spot along the shore "off and on about a year and a half."

"I have anxiety issues, and I think I have personality disorders, too, that I’m dealing with. I think that’s what’s kept me out here so long," Paula said, admitting that she has become addicted to meth since suffering a bad breakup.

"There’s a few shelters I like. They would have been great except for the no-drugs thing. That sucks. I don’t think drugs are my problem," she said. "I think my problem is I have no place to wash my hair and go to the bathroom."

Going even further out on a limb, I’ll suggest that the shelters do offer bathrooms and even quasi-hair salons, even if that latter amenity is just a toilet bowl. If not, surely a few port-a-potties in the hallways would provide a cheap solution.

And related, why does San Francisco have a “food desert”, and why does it lack Walgreen’s and CVS stores even though the city has legalized shoplifting, drugs, and using the sidewalks as toilets, and replacing the police with sympathetic social workers? If you’ve built a paradise, shouldn’t there be plenty of consumers for retailers’ wares?

San Franciso Whole Foods closes a year after opening due to crime.

A recently opened Whole Foods Market in San Francisco closed its doors on Monday over growing crime in the downtown area, according to a report.

The popular grocery store chain shuttered its SF flagship location a little more than a year after it opened, citing worker safety concerns, the San Francisco Standard reported.

“We are closing our Trinity location only for the time being,” a Whole Foods spokesperson told the local outlet in a statement. “If we feel we can ensure the safety of our team members in the store, we will evaluate a reopening of our Trinity location.”

The company said rampant drug use and growing crime led to its decision, a city hall source told the Standard.

The Whole Foods store had already reduced its hours in October last year after experiencing “high theft” and hostile patrons, a store manager said.

Greedy, profit-seeking capitalist bastards.