Maybe they should bring back human sacrifice — that’s always a sure crowd-pleaser

tickets available at the dean’s office

What if they built a $250,000 “Native and Indigenous Healing Garden” and nobody came?

That’s what the University of California at San Diego did, and it seems irrelevant that the wokettes didn’t bother explaining the difference between “native” and “indigenous” (it goes without saying that whites are excluded from both categories), because two years on, it sits empty and unused.

That could be because of a lack of Aztecs on campus — apparently, the garden was supposed to placate and soothe them in some way, but since they’re pretty much extinct, and definitely aren’t wandering around San Diego, their absence can be forgiven.

Bummer, though.