With coffee shops and bars closed, a double shot of reality for undergrads

St. Mary’s College, Indiana: Department of Gender and Women’s Studies

Liberal arts degrees being renamed “non-essential worker degrees”

"We wanted to be a little more honest about what you can expect from a liberal arts program -- sorry, a non-essential worker program," said Charles C. Kettlebrook, Dean of Winstonhamington University in Philadelphia. "Whenever people need to be sent home, to be frank, you'll be the first to go. It will be kind of nice for you, sometimes, actually, since you'll get to stay home and collect a check from the government…."

Truth in advertising: "You'll know right from the get-go that the pottery, French literature, or zero-gravity space station basket weaving classes you're taking are completely useless and non-essential."

But what will happen when the Corona Dole stipends run out? Don’t worry; they’re here to stay.